 |
|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Title: SWEET BABY JESUS AND THE ORPHANS [Not all scams originate from Africa. Here's one fresh from India]
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear in Christ, [Oh. My favourite type of scam. Someone trying to get a donation under false pretences. Step in....]
From: Father William Wallace [OK. Everyone's seen my bread on head/fish on head baits. Time to take things another step further. If only all pictures were this easy to get!] Dear brother in Christ, God bless you and how are you today? Your letter has come to the right place. My apologies for the late reply but your letter has only just been passed onto me by my secretary who told me that she received it by mistake, but I think God has intervened here. My name is Father William Wallace of the Holy Church of Fish, Bread and Wine, and we have nearly 300 churches in our ministry. I have attached a photograph of one of our newest small churches which we funded in Southern England. Pastor Rao I think I may be able to help you. Your cause is a Godly one and it is the policy of my church that we help our fellow man forward the word of God and help the less fortunate people. You see, my church regularly makes charitable donations to worthy causes, and after speaking with my committee members, we are of the opinion that your cause seems very worthy and if you will allow us we would like to make a donation to your church if you will agree to help us forward the word of God as well as helping yourself in your sad situation. If you are willing to use the donation for the good of God and to help your less fortunate fellow citizens then I am sure we can quickly arrange a donation to be made to you. Your case seems very worthwhile, and whilst we cannot donate large amounts ( because we have already made many successful donations this year ) I think that the church would be able to send you the small sum of US $352,330 (three hundred and fifty two thousand, three hundred and thirty dollars). We are usually able to donate larger amounts but at the moment are funds are quite limited as we are at the end of our financial year. This money would be sent to you in a manner of your choosing, and hopefully it would enable you to forward the word of God much more easily. Of course, we do not send out payments without going through the proper procedures, so if you would like to claim the donation, these are the steps you will need to take: 1. The Church of Fish, Bread and Wine will send you a agreement form, which you will have to complete and sign. 2. On receipt of the form, we will require a photograph of you, or a trusted representative as proof of identity. You will have to get a NEW photograph taken, holding the three symbols of our church. The three symbols we need you to hold are a FISH, a loaf of BREAD, and a bottle of WINE (the name of our church). This proves that the person in the photograph is genuine. Passport or other photographs will NOT be accepted. If you agree to the two conditions above, we will attach the agreement form for you to complete, and then after that we will explain to you what type of photograph we need from you. Please do not send any photographs until we have explained how we want the photograph to be taken. On receipt of a SATISFACTORY photograph, we will immediately forward the $352,330.00 to you in a manner of your choice. Please let me know ASAP if you are interested in my offer Pastor Rao and I will forward you the agreement for your signature ASAP. May God bless you, your Church and your family, Father William Wallace
[The Holy Church of Fish, Bread & Wine!]
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father William Wallace,
From: Father William Wallace Dear Brother Rao, I am happy that my church will get the chance to give you what you rightly deserve. Please find attached to this email the Agreement Form, which you simply need to fill in with your name and sign. Once you have completed the form, please return it as an attachment, and then once we receive the picture proof as described below we shall be able to proceed immediately with your donation payment. Brother Rao, please read the following very carefully: First it is VERY IMPORTANT that you understand we must be 100% certain of your identity. Because our church is so very large and we give out nearly $10 million Dollars a year in charitable donations there are some people who try to send us false images in order to falsely claim a donation. Because of this my church always request identity in a manner which cannot be forged. I warn you now brother Rao that the photographic proof we will request from you may seem very strange, but it is this very unusual request that will ensure that the image you send to use is genuine. I am sure that you will agree that to pose for a unusual picture will be no trouble considering the sum of 352,330.00 we are willing to donate to you. Here is the donation procedure in detail. Please read through it carefully, and if you agree to the terms of the church then we will forward you the agreement certificate.
2. Next you will have to send the church a photograph of yourself in the pose we describe below.
Here is how we need the photograph to be posed. I will go through it step by step so that you fully understand.
2. You will need to sit in a chair. 3. You will need to place the FISH in your RIGHT hand. 4. You will need to place the bottle of WINE in your LEFT hand. 6. Now get a colleague to take a photograph of yourself in this pose.
Once both the photograph and the agreement form have been received and approved, your donation payment will be paid out IMMEDIATELY in a manner of your choosing. If the amount is too large for your preferred method of payment we will be happy to split the donation into more manageable amounts. My good brother Rao, of course I fully understand that the picture request seems very strange, but as I have explained before, it is this very strangeness that will ensure to the Donation Committee that the image is not a forgery. If you are in agreement with the church's request, please get back
to me ASAP and I will forward you the agreement form. You will also
be given a Donation Agreement reference number which you must quote
on all future correspondence. [AGREEMENT FORM ATTACHED]
[In one of my fastest ever "get a dumb pic" baits, Kothapalli comes through with an excellent example] From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father William Wallace, SIGNED AGREEMENT FORM
AND HERE'S PASTOR KOTHAPALLI RAO HIMSELF!
[ I'll send the Pastor a 'Well Done' email shortly
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father William Wallace, I greet you in Jesus name. It is just to inform you that I had sent information to you with the picture of myself having the fish in one hand, wine bottle in another hand and bread on my head. Did you receive it ? I sent it to you on 21st January. I have been looking forward to receive your kind e-mail. I am praying to God to strengthen you all the way to help me. Please remember me once and email me. I shall await your kind email prayerfully and hopefully. Sincerely your humble servent
[OK, lets see if I can introduce another character into the proceedings] From: Father Dean Martin Dear Pastor Rao,
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father Dean Martin, I am extremely sorry to know Father Wallace was killed in such tragic accident. Please extend our sincere sympathies and condolenece to the bereaved family I shared it with my family and with my people here. They felt very sorry and they are also sending their sympathies. We can't expect any thing that happens in our lives. Every thing happens according to the will of God. We sincerely pray for the comfot of the bereaved family. May his spirit be in rest with our Lord. Sincerey your humble servant [I'll let Rao stew for a while]
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father Dean Martin Previously, Dated 6-2-2004, we had forwarded an e-mail by Expressing our deep and heart Felt condolences to the bereaved family of Father William wallace to you subsecuently, we had conducted special prayer meeting in our church congregation, myself, our family members, our Church congregation member and our fellow ministry members prayed the God not only for the family members of father wallance but also your family members. Most obviously we are continously praying the God for the family members of father wallace to have a peace, tranquility and prosperity to their family. May God shall always be with the family members of father wallace. Please pray for us as we pray for you we shall await for your further valuable responce at an Earliest with fervent hope. Thaking you Brother, [And stew...]
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Brother in Christ, Previously, we had forwarded two e-mails to you, specifically we had conveyed our deep and heart felt condolences Father william wallace Still, we are praying the God that God should give peace, Tranquility and stebility for the family members of willam wallace. Soon after the demise of william wallace, we do Firmly feel that the Entire Herculian task and Responsibility had been put on your shoulders and because of these factors, you might have been busy with your Respective Shedules and your Mission work. I had already Forwarded our Photo and Agriment Form, to the kind notice of William wallace and as such at present our photo and agriment form might be at your possesion, most obviously, prior to the demise of william wallace, he had been clearly and fairly promised us to extend some help to us. Therefore Brother, By taking the congnizence of our concerns in to consideration and notice, it is our humble request, as our's is the Foor Family and we are being Experienced pathetic state of conditions and as such. Kindly pray for us, kindly put our pathetic state of conditions in your Regular prayers and kindly extend your prayerful co-operation in each and every Endeavours of our Ministry concerns. We do hope you may react very peacefully and positively for all our concerns and anticipating for your further the most Fruitful Responce as early as possible with Fervent hope. Convey my good Regards and best wishes to your Family members and for your fellow Ministry members. Please prayfor us as we pray for you. Thanking you Brother.
[Time to reply to Pastor Rao, to tell him the reason for the long delay in replying to him, and introduce yet another character. There's been a tragic event..] From: Father Ed Wood Pastor. Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao, Good day sir and God bless you. My name is Father Wood, and I am contacting you on behalf of The Holy Church of Fish, Bread and Wine.. You may be surprised to hear from me but I have been going through some old files and paperwork which was discovered at the site of one of our churches. First I must explain something to you which you probably are not aware of. I believe the last person to communicate with you was Father Dean Martin? I am afraid I have to give you the disturbing news that Father Martin was killed in a church fire. This is why you have not had any contact from him for some time. It is not yet known what caused the fire at the church, but tragically the whole church was burnt to the ground. Eight people were killed, including Father Martin and some members of the church donation committee, along with the church rector Father Spleen. The fire was so ban that nearly everything was destroyed including computer files. We have spent two weeks searching through the remains of the church and managed to find some small piece of paperwork but almost everything was totally destroyed. Until your email came through this morning I did not know Father Martin was in contact with you. Mr. Rao, I do not have any real idea why Father Martin was in contact with you, and sadly there are no survivors who can give me any information about you. It would aid me greatly if you would be able to give me some brief information as to what business you were doing with Father Martin. If father Martin was trying to help you in some way, please let me know. We have now moved to new premises and are able to continue our work as normal. With blessings and love, Father Wood. [I attach a picture of the burnt church remains, of course with a familiar addition to regular readers!]
[Pastor Rao forwards a LONG explanation of how plans were going so well until....] From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Brother in Christ, Greetings to you in the Majstic Name of our Beloved Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I received your E-mail and I had made recent perusal of your E-mail in most. Sensitive, comprehensive and Rational outlook and also understood all the Principal Contents of the same thank you very much for your E-mail. Frist of all please kindly pardon me and I am Extremley very sorry for my delayed Responce to you, why Because for the last Fewdays we were being busy withour Routine shedule. Gosphel outreach programs in the interior villages. In accordence with E-mail, we came to know that and also we had herd the very disturbing news that father Dean Martin was killed in a church Fire some weeks ago this news had given us shock and grief like anything. We have Felt a lot and we are sending our hartfelt Condolences to the family members of Father Dean Martin. Any way Brother the sudden and tragic denise of Both Father William Wallance and Father Dean Martin, is agreat Loss for me and also for our Ministry's Endeavours despite all these happenings, during your Churching through the remains of the Church we had Foundout apeace of document for which the matter contained in the document was the E-mail message for which I had Forward to the Kind notice of Father Dean Martin. After being done like this, besides unprecedented sorrow and grief in your mind, you had sent us a detailed E-mail Message on 6 - 3, 2004. For this I shall be very thankful and grateful to you for your Promptness and generosity in this Regard. Please prominently Note that Brother, So, far, I had Forwarded there E-mails only to the Kind notice of Father Dean Martin. Except this, Nothing Business had been taken place th Between him and me. In this connection, for your kind information I am here by Forwarding the last E-mail message, for which I had forwarded to the kind notice of father Dean Martin. Please kindly take a Note of it. Previously, we had forwarded two e-mails to you, specifically we had conveyed our deep and heart felt condolences Father william wallace Still, we are praying the God that God should give peace, Tranquility and stebility for the family members of willam wallace. Soon after the demise of william wallace, we do Firmly feel that the Entire Herculian task and Responsibility had been put on your shoulders and because of these factors, you might have been busy with your Respective Shedules and your Mission work. I had already Forwarded our Photo and Agriment Form, to the kind notice of William wallace and as such at present our photo and agriment form might be at your possesion, most obviously, prior to the demise of william wallace, he had been clearly and fairly promised us to extend some help to us. Therefore Brother, By taking the congnizence of
our concerns in to consideration and notice, it is our humble request,
as our's is the Foor Family and we are being Experienced pathetic
state of conditions and as such. Kindly pray for us, kindly put
our pathetic state of conditions in your Regular prayers and kindly
extend your prayerful co-operation in each and every Endeavours
of our Ministry concerns. We do hope you may react very peacefully
and positively for all our concerns and anticipating for your further
the most Fruitful Responce as early as possible with Fervent hope.
And moreour, previously, I had Forwaded duely signed Agrement Form, Donation No. 936842/BR/RAO. Hence Brother, in this aspect for your kind information, I am here by Forwarding the scanned copy of the Document, through Attochment, to your kind notice and Fire. Therefore brother, by taking all the Aforenentioned
matters and Factors in to consideration Notice, From Now onwards,
we do sygniticantly need your involvement and prayerful cooperation
in Each and every Herculian Endeavours of our respective Ministry.
We do hope we may react very peacefully and positively for all our
concerns and hope to do so Accordingly. We shall await for your further the most valuable and Fruitful responce as Early as possible in this Regard with utmost Eagerness and Fervent hope. Thanking you
From: Father Ed Wood Dear Pastor Rao, [Can I really get another picture out of the pastor,
and could it possibly be as good as the first one he sent to me?!]
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Brother in Christ, I received your E-mail and I shall be very thankful and Grateful to you for your sharp and prompt responce. I shall be once again very gratitudanal to you for being shown much intrest and most obviously forbeing evinced keen Affection towards our concerned as Regards to our Ministry Activities. In accordence with your E-mail and also according to your personal View points, we came to Realized that only very small information that had been left behind pertarning to late father Dean Martin and Father Willian Wallace handling a Donation payment deal with me. Hence Brother, now you are stating and informing us that "the New procedure will have to be started again freshly in this aspect", according to Respective uk Charity Laws and more over, you are Sujjesting us that new initiative is to be begun in this aspect and accordingly, on my part, I being the servent of God, I do stand by my word, I am here by very fairly abiding and bound to your stipulated guidlines and conditions that have been set out by your uk. Charity and I am very heartly saying that I shall cooperate with you in all aspects for the smooth process of this sensitive matter. Therefore Brother, In Regard to New donation Agrement Number, Relevent instructions and New photo, I shall Fallow your Further Clear Cut Direction and let me know in which way I shall have to proceed. It is my humble Request kindly Furnish me all the ligible and Reliable Details of an Earliest for my onward process of work. Convey my good Regards and best wishes to your family members and also your respective members of the Holy Church of Fish, Bread and wine. Please pray for us as we pray for you. Anticipating for your furher the most valuable and Fruitful Responce at an Earliest in this Regard with Fervent hope. Thanking you Brother,
From: Father Ed Wood Dear Pastor Rao, God bless you my brother for your very prompt reply. I am sure that we can be quick to come to a very successful conclusion. I do believe that you already know about the Donation Agreement form. We will need to send you a new form to sign but of course you know that this is a simple matter so I feel I do not need to explain that particular procedure to you. Now on to the matter of the photograph. I am not aware how well the photograph we require has been explained to you previously, so please forgive me if I am repeating things that you are already aware of.: To put it simply, we require a new photograph of you in a pose that well prove to use that the person in the photograph is indeed your good self. We require that the image is posed in such a way that only the person we are communicating with would know how to send the picture in. This way we can be 100% certain that the image is genuine. Of course, to ensure people do not try to send us copies of previous images we always ask for a different image every time a new donation request is made. Therefore, please send your new photograph according to the following instructions:
SWEET BABY JESUS AND THE ORPHANS! Hold this sign and have your photograph taken holding it. DO NOT ADD ANY OTHER WORDS OR WRITING. Just write the 6 (six) words above. 2. You need to sit in a chair and hold a symbol of our church. For this photograph we would like you to use a FISH. You can hold it in your HAND, or place it on your LAP. Please try to use the largest type of fish you are able to find.
Once the donation committee receive a satisfactory image I will contact you and send you the Donation Agreement form to sign and date. Once the Agreement Form has been received then your donation payment will be made out immediately and in the manner of your choosing. Please advise me of the date you expect to be able to provide the picture. Also, please take note of your new Donation Agreement number, this is 947114/EW/RAO. Please quote this number on all future correspondence. May God bless you, Father Ed Wood.
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Brother in Christ I had Recived your Email and I had made decent perusal of the same in a most sensitive, comprehensive, Rational and Emperical outlook and understood all the contents of your Email in a Dignified out look thankyou very much for your kind and decent Email. I shall be once again very thankful and grateful to you for being shown keen and much intrest towards us, despite some hard and unfortunate incidents taken place previously. In accordence with your Email I do stand by my word in the Name of Lord Jesus Christ and I being the servent of God I shall always fairly and honestly Abide by your stipulated tearms and conditions. Now, I am getting Ready to take Freshly New Photograph as you had directed me to do so in this aspect in your Email, you have specified that “Once your Respective donation committee recive our satisfactory Image from my side and then you may asks us to Forward the said donation Agreement form with my due sign and date”.Accordingly I shall Fallow and do this work in due cource of time. At this Juncture, I once again very humbly draw your attenction and right earnestly stating my candid view points, for which as regards to this specific matter, we shall have to answerable and accountable to the respective finance and home departments of our Government of India. In your previous Email, you had specified the amount, sum of U.K. sterling Pounds worth 352,330.00. In our Indian Rupees worth 3,04,80,000 (In words : Three Crores Four Lakhs Eighty Thousand Rupees). Hence Brother, In accordence with the stringent provisions of the respective act, Min istry of Home Affairs, Government of India, we shall have to take F.C.R.A. (Foreign Contribution Regulation Act of 1976.) Though we had a F.C.R.A., If the Amount execcds in Rupees 40,00,000 (In words Forty Lakhs), we shall have to proceed for further provisions, Ministry of Home Affairs for their Approval and Enforsement. We are all bringing forward all these genuine, Ligible and Authentic maters very humbly to your kind notice and file, for your goodself and peaceful reaction in this regard. Perhaps as you know pretty well something about our Government of India’s respective provisions of the said acts. I need not explain in detailed to you in this regard. Therefore Brother, As regards to this specific subject matter, If you want any further more Information and clarifications from our side, we shall furnish all such reasonable, genuine and authentic information to your kind notice and file accordingly. please pray for us as we pray for you. I once again very honestly Insisting and Asserting that I do stand by my word in the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ. We shall await for your further the most valuable and fruitful responce at an earliest in this regard with fervent hope Thanking you Brother,
From: Father Ed Wood Dear Pastor Rao, My sincere thanks for your detailed on comprehensive reply to my last communication. With regards to the donation amount and your governments provisions, I am sure that we shall have no problems in this respect. Although I personally do not have experience in the financial world, our ministry does have many good lawyers who are able to handle such proceedings, and they have vast experience transferring money to many different parts of the world. Pastor Rao, please would you advise me on what date you expect to be able to forward the photograph? The donation committee have made enquiries to me and I would like to be able to advise them accordingly. Take care my brother, Father Ed Wood.
From: Pastor Kothapalli Prabhakara Rao Dear Father Ed Wood I received your E-mail and I had gone through all the Principal contents of your E-mail in a most sensitive and Rational out look thank you very much for your E-mail. In accordence with your E-mail and with your specific direction to me, I am ready to send our picture to you TOMORROW 30-3-2004, through attachment. Soon after you had received our photo with Banner and we do Firmly hope and anticipating "Donation Agreement Form" from you for our further process of work. Please pray for us as we pray for you. We shall await for your further valuable responce at an Earliest in this regard with fervent hope. Thanking you,
|
] 
 |