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TITLE: Art For Art's Sake PAGE TWO
Oh dear. The paintings still have not arrived and Alexander is anxious. From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, I write to know if you have send this mail, please do let me know. Thia boys are on my neck, i do not and will not see my name drage to the mod for any reason. I will appriciate if you can please clear this matter as urgent as possilbe. God bless you Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
I cannot understand what the delay is. Tribble Postal Systems are usually extremely swift, and my company use them for almost all our courier needs, except for sandwiches. After some delay I have managed to find the receipt they gave to me. My apologies that it looks a little crumpled but I searched high and low for it and thought I had lost it. Fortunately I discovered it on the bottom of my son's hamster cage. Please find a copy attached below. By the way, my son's hamster is called Bert. Tomorrow I shall send one of my slav... erm, employees to the Tribble head office to demand an explanation. I shall get back to you shortly. Sincerely, I attach the shipping recept:
True to my word, I have spoken with the bosses at Tribble HQ and managed to get some compensation. From: Derek Trotter
Thank you for your patience. I have bad news and good news for you. The bad news is that Tribble Postal Systems have now admitted to me that they have lost your artwork somewhere in transit (not sure where that is, but it sounds like a place I don't want to be). Anyway, I spoke with the head honcho at Tribble HQ and after a heated telephone conversation the good news is that they have agreed to pay compensation for the loss of the artwork. I do apologise for all the delay Mr. Ofuonyeadi but I hope you will understand that this is not my fault but those lazy arsed vagabonds at Tribble Postal Systems. After some consultation they have agreed to pay my full compensation claim of UK £38,774 (US $68,760), and this morning I received a letter and cheque for the full amount, which I will cash later this afternoon. For your records I have attached a copy of the letter and of course a scan of the cheque. Once again I apologise for the rather rough appearance of the letter but Bert the hamster got his paws on it whilst I left it at the dining room table on one of my many visits to the toilet (I have been suffering from food poisoning after eating a very badly cooked ratburger). I'll swing for that hamster one of these days, you mark my words. Anyway, I hope that you will be happy with the outcome and I shall await your reply at your earliest convenience. Sincerely, The letter of apology:
The cheque:
Alexander replies and is keen to get his hands on the money. From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, Thanks for your mail. I do understand all you where trying to say to me, but also I understand how far you have gone to see that the boys here in Nigeria will not look at the whole thing as if I am trying to play on them. Well, I advice that you see what you can send to them. And I shall give it to them. It is ok, and I hope we will then rest the case. Thanking you while I expect your reply, because I have showed the boys this mail. So how do you wish to send the money to us here in Nigeria? Please do let me know how you may want to send the money to us.. Waiting for your reply. Regards, Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
Thank you for your reply and your understanding. I think that the fastest and simplest way to pay you would be via a Western Union payment. Are you able to accept such a payment in Nigeria? Please let me know and I will endeavour to send you the cash as soon as possible. Please note that I will have to deduct a small fee for my expenses that I have incurred, however this will be a tiny amount and as a businessman yourself I hope you can understand that. So please, forward me your payment information and I shall make the payment and of course send you a copy of the receipt with all the relevant details. Sincerely,
Alexander is happy for me to take out my expenses, so of course I will do so. From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, Thanks for your reply well as a Christian I do not have any
option that you are going to take some amount of money, and also
your preferred means of payment. ALEXANDER OFUONYEADI. BY YOUR PREFERED MEANS OF PAYMENT. It is ok by me. And send the informations of payment to me,. Thanking you for your understanding too. Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
Thank you for your email and your understanding about my expenses, it is very much appreciated. I am now happy to inform you that I have now made the full payment to you (after my expenses have been deducted as agreed) this morning my Western Union. The payment details are as follows:
Name of recipient: Alexander Ofuonyeadi
Attached is a copy of my payment receipt. My scanner is unfortunately not working so I had to take a photograph of the receipt. I apologise for the appearance of Bert, however it is difficult to keep him away from any kind of paperwork as you already know. Thank you once again for your patience and please pass on my Christmas greetings to your artists. Sincerely, The Western Union payment receipt:
Alexander probably can't believe his own eyes, and double-checks. From: Alexander Ofuonyead THANKS FOR YOUR MAIL.
From: Derek Trotter
From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Mr. Derek, I do not understand the mail you send to me. From your first mail to me if I understand what you mean this was the amount you told me: Anyway, after some consultation they have agreed to pay my full compensation claim of UK38,774 (US $68,760), and this morning I received a letter and cheque for the full amount, which I will cash later on this afternoon. why are you sending to me this : Name of recipient: Alexander Ofuonyeadi And the number is not even in existence on the western union, please explain to me, as they are still waiting. So please I will want you to explain this to me, as I know that this cannot be my own money. I do understand you when you ask that you will take some amount
for your expenses but I do not understand how you came to the amount
you are sending to me. Thanking you for your understanding. Regards, Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, I do not understand what you really mean, and I can not reconcile
all you are saying, but I think it will be better that you send
us back our art work, if you what you are saying is that the full
payment is $1.56 (one dollar and fifty six cents) I think you from
the mail you send and the cheque there is no bases to what you are
telling us, so please do let know what you are trying to do as the
boys are aware of all your mails to me, and the event of thing. Because from your first mail you told me that it was UK38, 774
(US $68,760) and I do not know where you got the amount that you
are talking g about. And please confirm your telephone number or better still you can call me on my own number for reconciliation of this matter. My number again: 234803306xxxx.this is a cell number so you can get me any time. Thanking you for your understanding. Yours faithfully, Alexander ofuonyeadi
From: Derek Trotter
From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, I can not understand what you are talking about, I think it will be better for you to re read the mail you sent to me before now. Please I want you to understand that that it might take time, but I MUST get to the root of this matter. Please for GOD sake do what you think is right before you GOD and man. Do please read the mail you sent to me, all your mails to me have filed copy. Please amend your ways and see things to be done the right way. I want to ask who is this BERT? And what has that got to do with what we are doing? So I expect you to tell me what is going on. I also ask that you call or give me your own phone number that you never talk about. I will be waiting for your reply and possibly make things right so that friendship will continue. Thanking you for your understanding. Regards, Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
Quite frankly I am insulted that you are asking me who Bert is. Did I not mention him to you nearly two weeks ago that Bert is a hamster? In fact I have mentioned Bert to you on four separate occasions, the first in my email to you of December 8th. You have also seen a picture of Bert, or did you not spot him on the Western Union payment? I can understand though how you might have missed the little bugger as he has such excellent camouflage. Look closely again, and if you concentrate very hard you might just spot him. Just in case Bert is too well hidden in the Western Union picture, I have attached another photograph of myself and my brother, Rodney. As you can see I am holding Bert in that picture. My apologies, I thought I had previously given you my telephone number however it appears I did not. For your records it is +44 8707 653 XXX. Please do not telephone between the hours of 2pm and 3pm GMT as this is Bert's feeding time and he is liable to go ballistic if he is disturbed when eating his favourite dish (black pudding & custard). I know he is small, but the little blighter can make one a hell of a commotion when antagonised. I don't think need to tell you the kind of damage a sharp-toothed rodent can do to your gonads when in full flow I'm sure. Derek Trotter Time for another Photoshopped pic!
Damn! Looks like I've been busted! Alexander must have got frustrated and decided to do some research into Derek and he has stumbled onto 419eater and spotted this very scambait! From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, I waited for your reply to my mail, but until now you never reply to my mail. Please I want to let you know that all you have been doing to me I do understand and I only allow you to go ahead with all your tricks, and if you do not mind, the web site you put all my mails and you calling me 419 EATER with this on the web site My Documents\Welcome to the 419 Eater DEREK files Alexander seems to confuse the location of the files on his computer with the actual address of 419eater! well, I want you to understand that you dont call all Nigerians 419, and for the first ever mail I sent to you, the project I do., and I also want you to know that the company is duly registered here in Nigeria, hence, I have never ever thought of doing any thing fraud. I will also want you to understand that you asked if I can arrange for artist, that I did, and sent to you, with my receipt, and I can not understand why you turn to put my name in your so call 419 eaters, I saw all our mails there, but was just following you, and if you remember, that was why I told you that I do file all our mails. so I thank you so well, BUT I WILL WANT TO HAVE THE TWO ART WORK BACK TO NIGERIA PLEASE. Please I asked that you send to me back the art work, and keep your money to your self, and better stop spoiling ones name. However, I have sent all our mails to my lawyer with your shipping company letter and cheque and I ask that you delete my name from your web site. Excellent! Maybe I'll get a lawyer to play with next! Thanking you. and I advice you to be humble and respect people. I just want you to understand this. If you remember, when you asked that you wanted to send the money I asked you to send it and you told me that you will want to send the money via western union, I knew all your deals, and even your western union receipt with rat RAT?! all I saw, and that was why I was asking you to give me your real phone number. Please I repeat send back the two (2) ART works now. Thank you and god bless you and judge you and i. Regards, Alexander Ofuonyeadi. Quite a civil letter, but you can bet Alexander is seething with fury! After visiting my site, and reading the full correspondence, Alexander still thinks my name is Derek Trotter. How strange!
From: Derek Trotter
I would respectfully request that you do not to call Bert a rat, that is most insulting. I had to cover Bert's eyes just in case he saw that. I have already told you he has a vile temper. Anyway, to the main content on your letter; let us examine the claims on your company website: "We a trailblazer in the special events design,we design,markets and advertise. We are a team of experts and talented individuals in different fields coming together in forming what is know today. As one of the most prominent full-service production companies in the country, our allure draws a host of corporate clients from across the nation and overseas. Whether you’re planning an event in any part of the country, or anywhere in the world, our team of experts will make it unforgettable." Now tell me Alexander, why would the head of such a very large and successful sounding company such as yours be sending out begging letters for money disguised as a church? Why would such a successful businessman such as yourself BEG people you do not know for money? Your successful business could easily donate to the church couldn't it? I know I was not the only person to receive your original begging letter. I have evidence that you sent out hundreds of similar BEGGING letters. Just why would a successful and presumably rich businessman do that Alexander? Why is a successful businessman using a free Hotmail & Yahoo account instead of his official company domain name? Now, I have taken a look at your "What we do" page and I would be interested in you providing me with proof of the following;
I would of course check for myself by looking at your portfolio page on your site, however you have nothing there. I shall await your reply with baited breath. Sincerely, Derek Trotter
A reply comes in less than an hour later but I am not given any information about his company's products or services... as expected. From: Alexander Ofuonyead Dear Derek, Thanks you for your quick reply. I do understand that I was writing mail BEGGING FOR AIMS but very happy that I did not tell lies that I am this or that. Well it is only God that knows once heart. And I think God that I did not and will never lie with his name. Well, like you ask about my own company, well, I know that what ever you see in there is what we can do, and I still thank God that even when you asked that I should get those that are talented, that I did, and I never asked you for any penny before doing all you asked that we should do. However, I do not want to exchange words with you BUT humbly ask that you send back the 2TWO art works back to us, please. I have a calling, and I did BEG but never lie to any one, and I think if you are God fearing, I never asked that they should give this money to m for my personal use so watch your words. Yes, I am into other businesses, and I do use this for the work of God at my own capacity, and I hope that God will bless me more so as to do his work, and spread his word all over the world. So if I word internationally or not it is left for my client, and me and I thank God for that. Please send back the artwork to the owners. Thanking you. Alexander Ofuonyeadi.
From: Derek Trotter
Not much to report sadly. Alexander never did provide me with evidence that his business is legitimate, in fact I found out that his website was copied almost word for word from another legitimate site and the business name changed. So people, please stay away from exquisiteglobalint.8m.com as the owner is an out and out scammer. Feel free to email him to let him know. His contact details are [email protected] and [email protected] Tell him Del boy said hello!
END.
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