Reverend Bondi Cigars is a Touch Too Much for Sister Mary

Sister Mary Kolams [The Scammer]

Reverend Bondi Cigars [A pastor from Boston]

Mr Freddy Taylor [A shifty diplomat from Accra]

Professor Rupert J Felcher III [Special guest appearance]

Additional comments by me [not my real photo !]

 

 

[Origin of the term 'Bondi Cigar': ".....A few years ago Bondi Beach had a terrible problem with 'effluence' floating in the water and washing up on the sand because of a faulty sewerage system in Sydney. These raw deposits were named various things including 'blind mullets' and 'Bondi Cigars'. Contact with one of these 'cigars' was invariably an unpleasant experience and could leave the victim in a state of shock. Bondi Cigars were known to target unsuspecting interstate and international tourists....."]

 

 

For this scambait, the Reverend Father Bondi Cigars takes a break from his regular duties (whatever the hell they might be) and steps up to the plate for the first time as a solo act. The scammer, Mary Kolams, much to her misfortune, dropped into his (my) clutches via the latest 419eater shuttle. That turned out to be one rocket-fuelled ride to disaster for her as we shall see…….

 

 

 

 

From: marykolams@cresce.net

To: xxxxxxxx@hotmail.fcom

Sent: 19-09-06

Subject: Let's arrange face-to-face meeting urgently 

Dear friend,

THIS TRANSACTION DEMANDS ABSOLUTE HONESTY.

I am Miss. MARY KOLAMS, the daughter of DR.S.I.KOLAMS, who was assassinated by the rebel juntas of my country Liberia. My late father, until his death was the personal assistance on monetary and financial matters to the president MR.CHARLES TAYLOR.He was assassinated by the rebels for not compromising to their demands. While he was alive, he used his position to secretly and concretely moved the sum of $45M.USD (Forty five million Dollars) out of my country to a safe depository firm in a safe and peaceful country where he lodged in the consignment that contains the fund to the safe depository without the real contents of the consignment revealed to the company, this he did for security reasons.

Nobody knows about this fund, not even the president. My family are now in peaceful country where they are taking asylum with the president Charles Taylor because our lives were at risk in our country Liberia, we believed that the rebels that killed my late father might still come after us, that is our reason of joining the president to asylum.I therefore want to know if you can secure this fund in your country? If you are in the best position to handle this transaction, I therefore suggest that you kindly re-confirm to me the followings:

1. Your full name.

2. Your mobile telephone number.

3. Your full contact address.

4. Your Profession, age and marital status.

As soon as this above information is received, I shall commence processes with the safe depository where the consignments that contains the fund is deposited for immediate lifting of the consignment to you to your designated address via a specially arranged courier services means. But this will be after our face-to-face meeting. I want you to also undersand that my inexperience in capital investment and fund management prompted me to contact you for this transaction. I also want you to understand that this transaction should be treated as a matter of urgency because our asylum here is been threatening because Charles Taylor is facing the world crime tribunal now.

It is to our interest to conclude our transaction before any drastic decision is taking against Charles Taylor or else we will be stranded. Remember also that this transaction should be handled with utmost secrecy and confidentiality for our own security and safety. Please send your reply to this address :  marykolams@indiatimes.com

Yours sister,

Miss. Mary Kolams. 

 

 

[Pffft. What a crock of shit. Even so, The Reverend Father Bondi Cigars, a man possessed of monumental powers of empathy and compassion, simply cannot resist reaching out to Sister Mary in her time of need…….Reaching out like a praying mantis reaching out to grab its next victim that is…….]

 

 

 

From: rev_bondi_cigars@fastmail.fm

To: marykolams@indiatimes.com
Sent: 20-09-06
Subject: GREETINGS IN JESUS NAME !!!

Calvary Greetings Miss Mary,

I am the Reverend Bondi Cigars. I am pastor of the Church of Progressive Entomology here in Boston. Our church has helped many people in similarly tragic circumstances and perhaps I can assist you. Please contact me again and I will furnish you with instructions on how to proceed in order to receive my assistance.

Regards,

Rev. Bondi Cigars

 

 

[Mary replies from a new email addy.]

 

 

 

From: marykolams@yahoo.com

To: rev_bondi_cigars@fastmail.fm

Sent: 20-09-06

Subject: study this Agreement/Bond of this transaction

 

Dear Reverend Father Bondi Cigars,

 

How are you today?

 

I am glad to receive your response and hereby forward to you an agreement/bond binding us in this transaction. If it is acceptable and ok by you, then advise so that we can proceed in this transaction.

 

[And here we have one typically trashy scammer document. This one wasn’t even an attachment. It was just cut and pasted into the body of the email, in fluorescent pink Comic Sans font, riddled with mistakes and gibberish.]

 

THIS AGREEMENT is made on the............day.........of..........2006.
 
BETWEEN MISS.MARY KOLAMS, ( hereinafter reffered to as the ''INVESTOR'',which ___expression shall where the content so admits,include his legal representatives, assigns,heirs and executors ) of the ONE PART; AND YOU………………………………………………….
of............................................................................................................................................................................................
hereinafter reffered to as the 'AGENT'', which ____expression
where the content so admits, include his legal representatives,  assigns, heirs and executors ) of the OTHER PART;
 
WHEREAS
----------------
The ''INVESTOR'' has agreed with the ''AGENT'' that the "INVESTOR" will invest her funds, into any lucrative business ventures and the "AGENT", has agreed to be the representative/agent on behalf of the "INVESTOR", in the purchase, administration and management of the business.

 

NOW THIS AGREEMENT WITNESSETH AS FOLLOWS:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That in consideration of the sum of
...................................................................................................................................
,investment capital by the ''investor'' in a joint business venture with the'' agent'', mentioned herein above, and to observe the following agreements reached by the ''investor'' and the ''agent''.
 
1. That the '' investor'' will provide an investment sum of.....................................for the joint business venture.
 
2.That  the ''investor'' will be entitled to a monthly report of the management and administration of the investment to be purchased with his investment capital, by the "agent"
 
3.That the ''agent'' will discharge the maximum level of diligence, honesty, professionalism and seriousness expected of him in the running of the affairs of this joint business venture.
 
4.That the "agent" will be solely in-charge for the purchase, administration, management and maintenance of the business /investment entered.
 
That Miss.Mary Kolams has issued an irrevocable power of attorney to YOU to handle on her behalf the investment/management of the sum of forty five millon American dollars(US$ 45 000 000.-) belonging to Miss.Mary Kolams. That YOU should discount, operate and run the said fund and investing same in lucrative business that is profitable to both parties

5.That  either parties to this agreement, reserves the right to terminate the business joint venture, but such a termination must be with a written notice to be served on the other party at least,(90 days),ninety days before such a termination takes place.
 
6.That the "investor and the "agent" have agreed to this joint business venture, for the sole purpose of being major players in business/investment business for the ultimate aim of making profits.
 
7.That the ''investor'' and the "agent" will bear the initial costs that will be incurred in the establishment of this joint business venture, by way of costs of air travels, hotel bills, solicitors fees, agreement fees etc.
 
8. Whereas under this agreement thirty percent(30%) net profit is to be received by YOU while seventy percent(70% will be received by Miss.Mary Kolams annually from any investment made for a period of ten(10)years.
 
9. . Whereas this bond holds that both parties are to remain faithful, trustworthy, honest and dedicated to each other during and after the transfer, investment and management of the fund has been concluded.

10. . Whereas the business in question shall remain secret and confidential to both parties as the true identity, origin and source of
the fund shall never be mentioned to a third party for security reasons.
 
18. YOU shall be obligated to meet face to face with Miss.Mary Kolams here in Dubai,United Arab Emirates to see, witness, authorised and authenticate the genuineness and certainty of the entire project/transaction in focus for familiarity purpose, mutual trust, understanding and confirmation of their persons as regards to the business transaction.
 
PROVIDED  ALWAYS that no terms or conditions shall be impaled into this agreement, except those expressly contained herein.
IN WITNESS WHEREOF THE ''INVESTOR'' AND ''THE'' AGENT'' hereunto have appended their signatures, the day, month and year first above written.
 
INVESTOR                                                         AGENT
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
NAME.....................................                         
NAME...........................             
SIGN............................                                  
SIGN........................... DATE..................................                            
DATE..........................
                                 SEAL OR STAMP

 

 

 

[Father Bondi Cigars nearly has a stroke trying to keep track of that load of horseshit. He elects to ignore it completely and instead go for the throat right away…….]

 

 

 

From: rev_bondi_cigars@fastmail.fm

To: marykolams@yahoo.com
Sent: 21-09-06
Subject: GREETINGS ONCE AGAIN IN JESUS NAME !!!

Calvary Greetings Sister Mary,

Thanks for the mail sister. I have studied the agreement. An outstanding document. I have sent it off to be analysed and completed by the church’s document processing committee. I am sure my church would be willing to assist you, however there are some small security modalities that would have to be addressed first. Please contact me again at the earliest possible opportunity for further instructions.

Regards
Father Bondi

 

 

 

[As you can see, Father Bondi is a bit of a control freak, and there’s no way he’s going to let Mary get the upper hand in these exchanges even for one minute.]

 

 

 

From: marykolams@yahoo.com

To: rev_bondi_cigars@fastmail.fm

Sent: 22-09-06

Subject: Meeting in Dubai

 

Dear Father Bondi,

 

You are truely and honestly a father to me as far as life is concerned since I do not have an earthly father again, you now stands as my earthly father now.

 

I am most glad to receive your response and acceptance to abide by the agreement/bond of this transaction and your assurance to assist me truely and honestly in this transaction.

 

You mentioned in your mail that 'there are some small security modalities that would have to be addressed first' please could you explain what you mean and how that would be addressed first.

 

Otherwise, I advise we proceed immediately in this transaction without any further delay. I advise for your urgent arrangement for the face-to-face meeting in Dubai and also to proceed in this transaction immediately.
I suggest we have this meeting in Dubai, United Arab Emirate.
This is because the delivery firm that will move the consignments that contains the fund from where the consignments are deposited now can bring it to Dubai where they have a representative/affiliate office, this means that we will proceed immediately in moving the fund to your country after our face-to-face meeting in Dubai for onward investment of the fund in your country.

 

Also, I want you to understand that the immigration officer here who is arranging this co